(warning cross-promotional shameless plug ahead.)
http://www.hanklazard.com/podcast.html
Check Season 2, Episode 27. The cast and crew of the Hank Lazard Show Podcast (of which I am a member) discuss whether or not Dane Cook is legally a chode. The consensus is "Yes, he is." Now as the news floods in about Dane Cook stealing jokes, I find my original statement even more true.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZ_710y4vR4
Now, here is a youtube "video." I use the term video loosely, since it is audio accompanied by a slideshow of text, instead of actualy moving images. But I digress, listen to the "video" it makes a decent case for Cook's chodeness... But that is not what captivated my eyeballs for more than 27 minutes. It is the seas and seas of comments on the "video." Legions of Cook fans come out of the woodworks (or electronworks as the case may be) to stand up for their favorite stand up comedian. These glimmering golden turds are worth a read, but allow me to shine a light on a few of my favs:
"ok buddy keep bangin that dictionary"
"OMFG, you must have no fucking life to go through this shit and try to make people believe that dane stole some faggots jokes."
"2) i ve heard simular things many time
3) THEY ARE DIFFRENT maybe only slightly but sense he changed them there diffrenet"
"i think ur a faggot"
"OMG that shit aint even fuckin close to DANE COOK...this LOUIS CK dude SUCKS ASS....DANE is the BEST...EVEN if he DID JOCK this dude...DANE TELL'S JOKES WAYYYYYYY BETTER"
It gets better.
But all of this made me ponder... and wonder... and thinkify... and brainilate... and mindmind... and brainmindmind... and brainmindmindmind. Then it hit me!
There is a supersecret special brain control device, or maybe some sort of occult magic (or magick) spell that is used to turn the masses into the igonrant masses. So many people become mindless (and mindmindless) and take this castor oil of comedy? It reminds me of another time in history... but it wasn't comedy, it was nazism.
Look at these similarities:
The two charismatics use the same arm motions while loads of people hang on their every word.
The followers of each like to shave their heads and adorn themselves with the logo of their master.
This is all pretty scary, right? Be afraid of Dane Cook fans. Soon they will be forming prison gangs and end up torturing their victims with verbatim recounting of the bootleg Cook Live in Branson bootleg CD they bought off of a street vendor in Niagra Falls for 30 Canadian Dollars.
***
Interesting side story here. I was Google Image searching for fans of Dane Cook and then searching seperately for neo-nazi's. Both searches turned up the same picture of John Lennon laying naked with Yoko Ono. What does John Lennon and Yoko Ono have to do with Nazism and Dane Cook? I will let you, Dear Readers, to research that yourself, and tell me. I am too busy jerking off to internet porn to do research.
2 comments:
It seems like I wasn't the only to make the connection:
from wikipedia
"Comedian Andy Kindler has been particularly critical of Cook in his stage act, saying "Thank you MySpace for inventing Dane Cook" and that "Dane Cook is a pyramid scheme. 'Tell ten friends who know nothing about comedy about him.'"[16] He criticized his lack of material by asking a crowd "Do you think people drive home from a Dane Cook concert and go 'Ha Ha Oh my god we've been had! There's not a goddamn joke within a hundred miles of his act!'" In comparing the Dane Cook phenomenon to the spread of Nazism in Germany, Kindler asserted that "Dane Cook is worse than Hitler, because at least Hitler had a point of view!"[17]"
I hope I am not accused of stealing material now.
you fucking ass...you just had to put a picture of two dudes "docking" up, didn't you. My own imaginary mental images of this concept was bad enough, now I will have a permanent confirmation of the actual practice seared into my mind scape. TOO SOON!!!TOO SOON!!!
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